Dirty Laundry

There's a lot of heavy shit going on. There's a lot of hurt feelings, anger and fear. Family stuff is tough. Every family has laundry. Sometimes it's clean, sometimes the mud is flying. Right now, we could use a lot of stain remover.

Considering that everyone deals with stuff at one point of time or another, it's nothing to be ashamed of in my opinion. It's a time to ask for help, love, forgiveness. These are the times that make us grow, that build character and that make us better, stronger, more loving people.

In the end, it's not about being right. It's about loving and being loved. It's about listening and forgiving, not just each other but ourselves as well. We're here to build bridges and strengthen connections. Being self-rightous, indignant, stubborn and unforgiving, just leaves us miserable and alone. Everybody's right and everybody's wrong OR nobody's right and nobody's wrong. It really doesn't matter. We all make mistakes. What matter's is how we deal with ours (and others) mistakes. Are we honest? Do we make changes so that we don't make the same mistakes again? Do we learn? Do we forgive? Do we love? After all, we're all just doing the best we know how. But today may demand better than yesterday's best. We have to ask if we're up to the challenge.

We need to ask ourselves what is most important in our lives. And build our lives and actions around that. For me, it is most important to love and to be loved. To surround my self with caring people who listen, talk, learn, share, laugh, cry, forgive and grow. To be around those people, I have to be one of them. Sometimes it's hard to remember to do, but I try. I depend on my friends to help me question my actions and be the best person I can be. And then, to celebrate the process with me.

I learned this from some amazing people, especially my father. He's had to remind me to be better than I was being many times in my life. He's helped remind me of what's really important. He's helped me remember that things always work out for the best and sometimes we just need to let go of our fears, our need to be right and our need to know. He's helped me remember to trust - not just my self, but the goodness of others and the universe.

I know that we'll get the stains out. I hope that it will be sooner rather than later. Life is too short to let one moment of shared happiness go by. Change is hard. But it's worth it, because at the close of this cycle, the happiness we experience will be greater than we've known. At least that's what's happened before in my experience...